If you don't want anything to do with his child then leave him now. Its totally unfair to make him choose between you and the child, how would you feel if your partner didn't want to know your child?? He could end up choosing you over his child & regretting it for the rest of his life, plus he will resent you for it. You can't avoid his kid for ever so just get used to the child being there, why wouldn't you want anything to do with it, this is just a harmless child who hasn't done anything to you.

I would say thatif he wants u to move in and marry him he loves you and you love him, but his kid is a part of him..so you either choose to have it all or nothing...thats my opinion, Would he leave you if u had a kid and wanted to marry him?

Maybe one day you'll understand how heartless that sounds, however for now I guess, you have your reasons. I would say you cannot have a relationship with someone and not know their child. You are discounting yourself from the most important times you should share together. Christmas, birthdays, his joy and pride in sharing firsts. Maybe if you meet the child, set up an event where you can watch first, maybe at a park, watch him play with the child and when you feel you can, interact. Loving his child should come naturally, if you give the love a chance.

Move on, my friend. It's unfair for you and your partner. Time will heal. You will love again.